It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
