grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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