I'm so fucking centered right now
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
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