The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
