she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
