How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
