there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
