called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
