dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize