everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You've changed since you got that strap on
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
