There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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