Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize