we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Randomize
