; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
