I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
