help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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