Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
is that a dick in a sweater?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
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