I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
