Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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