I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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