and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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