So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
