I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
