You're completely useless in the revolution.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
