Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
