Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
