So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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