Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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