ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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