He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize