i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
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