That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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