wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
