I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize