i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
