Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
