i can't believe i had my finger in that
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
