it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
