Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
