I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
