He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
