Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
