At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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