There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
