That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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