we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
