And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
