he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
