we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
