So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
