Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
