Kiss
Puke
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
