Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
